catapult magazine

so, i have this theory. it’s that well, i kill conversation. it’s a theory. or rather most descriptively (spelled wrong) a hypotesis, still waiting to be a theory. it’s only here on cino, i post, no one responds. the funny thing is when i was on this other rockin’ message board called thinkwonder (rip) it happened too. not always but it worked it self out, so that when i’d post on something, no one would reply.

so, i guess this is my question, what is it that i do? is it that you don’t know who i am, so you don’t take me seriously? is it that i suck? is it that it just happens to be when a topic is dying that i post, and coincidene occurs?

i’ve been told i think about somethings to much, this maybe one of those things. in fact, i’m considering not putting this online…but i think i will for a while.

sub-question (high fidelity anyone?)
does anyone else here visit any other and participate in discussion boards besides cino? i know everyone and their brother silly simon has one, but i’m curious if there are others that you like or whatever.

i apologize for making look to me, i write in crazy circles, and i think i may be a selfish person…..

ta

(jimbo bam-bo says the blind banana.)

oh, i’m here.

i do enjoy the tom foolery.

but yea, i’m not sure whether to laugh at/with adam, or be upset because i suck, unless i don’t.

all kidding aside really, can i have my shorts back? i mean i went through all this, and now what? this crap about broader lifestyle.

what else is cool, i’m officially two genders. insert asexual joke.

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so, kim was married. i was single. we didn’t do anything really, i just got to know her better. that’s all really. except that i was extremely attracted to her. butin retro spect i didn’t really like her so much as what she was about. i liked her hair. i liked that her bangs fell right into her eyes. and i thought about how my hair did that once. and thats when she really fell for her husband right when my hair was doing that, or was it later? either way i still kinda liked her. in that man shes awesome and i feel like anothin’ in her presense. i shouldn’t be telling you this, but you are there, you listen, and you as far as i know haven’t done anything that contributed to his down fall. you didn’t set the bomb. because there wasn’t any bomb. there was a little thought. a thought of, what if that thing happpened to him adn there i was, sitting there with nothing to do with it, but sitting. but life doesn’t work that way. it doesn’t. so here i sit again, writing a letter to an unknown audience. an american who wants to be anything but. does it make a difference to anyone? what does it really mean that she would’ve liked to have dated me. that’s like saying it would have been really nice to know you, but now that i have to leave and go to this turkey place that you cant come, and i won’t ever be the same, i now just again sit, and say well, thats nice, but what does it mean? i mean does it mean we should do something, of course not. it means that in a weird not dating she’s married way i get to know her. purely as life lived with friends. friends whom you have but don’t know yet. i shouldbn’t be writing this down. i shouldn’t be bein’g so specific, but in the end it won’t matter, because whati think is specific will really be general, and what i think is general somone will take as specific. math, is a course that i remember well. once she asked how this applied to life. and he was like, well, you like that who art thing don’t you? well this is geometry and math is used in computers and i hear that they use computers in art these days. and she was like oh, yea. i made him sound stupid there, but in all actuality he was really nice and cool about it, i just wanted to make him sound vague and arrogant so that she sounded like a good person for agreeing with this moron math teacher who was actually a great teacher, but i thought that this would make the story better. in fact. i really think its funny that the reader never knows how much time like one word takes to jump into the brain. like, if i was searching in the head for like allusive, but couldn’t find it, i would just sitt here and be like, man it’s just like, and it’s just you know like and it’s oh what is it? and then it would come to me, allusive of course, and then i’d type that, but you’d never know that i sat, here, got up for some iced tea and went to go pee, and all this to find the word allusive. so yea. the other thing is that when you post on here, it’s like almost permanant. it’s like i’m saying this and that is that. that ‘s why i ramble a little. it’s because i don’t want it to be misconstrued. i try to say too much . i try to beat all the things down around it so you can just see what i’m saying, and that is that. but when doing that i start to wonder what i’m doing, because this idea that i just discredited i actually really like more that the idea that i just was trying to prove, and then i’m like screw this plant thing that i’m pulling all the weeds around it, i want the weeds. let the plant die. so then the logic is hard to follow, and i also seem to contradict what i’m saying.

i’ve said too much. the man who usually sits here is now away. he no longer uses this address, so i will be forewarding his mail via message boar.d i hope you don’t mind. he’s really a nice chap, and al that, but he just didn’t get along with the people whom he was associating with. therefor i regret to inform you of who you know as him, his demise. if this in anyway makes you weary or dry, please don’t hesitate to eat som e grapenuts or dried peaches.

i doth not shit you.

i said that once.

delete this post, it is a repeat.

I find it hard to come up with a response to that.

I find it hard to come up with responses to alot of these posts without sounding like an entirely uneducated moron. So I read and enjoy and make stupid comments (like on the wish list).

uck is a perfectly acceptible word for this thread.

raises both eyebrows.

not trying to bring this one back (sorry jo), just couldn’t let it happen to her on his very own post.

p.s. for the freethinking, searching, discussioning board that CINO is, i must admit that one unusual post threw it for a bigger loop than i expected.

What do you mean?

Seems to me there is only one post that shows any evidence of being thrown for a loop — and that rails not about moral value but rather points out the sillyness of this thread.

And it does seem to me that it is silly.

Although I am okay with that.

ahem.

Well, I know enok (Jack) personally, and while I’m not totally sure what was behind his earlier post, I’m going to take a stab at something . . .

It’s my guess that enok wanted to throw in a little bit of something new/different. I’ve often heard complaints that CINO’s discussion board is too long winded, sententious, intellectual, or pseudo-intellectual. While I don’t personally have any big problems with the discussions, I can see what they’re getting at. I don’t think it’s hard to see that it’s intimidating to post on here sometimes. Most of the people who frequenly post seem to be the ones who enjoy discussing things in logical, orderly, linear ways—sometimes at length. But there’s a lot more potential for this medium, as enok demonstrates.

I don’t think this thread is silly. I think that the CINO community would do well to stretch itself into other ways of relating online. Because like it or not, you intellectual, educated handful, you set the tone for this discussion board. If we can sift through 80-line essay posts about Current Events, why can’t we get through a bit of prose that doesn’t make “linear” sense? Don’t get me wrong, BBC, this isn’t really directed at you, it’s an impression I’ve had for awhile.

Here’s to weird, non-linear, and trivial posts.