catapult magazine

kirstin—I appreciated your editorial this issue. The first quote:

There are many females who never feel any sexual excitement whatever; others, again, to a limited degree, are capable of experiencing it. The best mothers, wives and managers of households know little or nothing of the sexual pleasure. Love of home, children and domestic duties are the only passions they feel. As a rule, the modest woman submits to her husband, but only to please him; and, but for the desire of maternity, would far rather be relieved from his attentions.

- From Know Thyself or Nature?s Secrets Revealed, a holistic health manual published in 1911

reminded me of a recent Oprah show…Oprah’s guests, mostly mothers, were responding to an article by Ayelet Waldman in the New York Times in which the author claimed to love her husband more than her children. While the wives and mothers Ayelet knew had hardly any sex, she and her husband got it on all the time, and she could only conclude that it was because she hadn’t transferred the bulk of her emotional energy to her children. In many ways, that quote from 1911 seems pretty applicable to many wives and mothers today (and add work/career responsibilites as another time and energy drain)—I constantly hear about women who are too busy/tired/etc. to pursue an active sex life with their partner…

I have two questions for Kirstin Vander Giessen-Reitsma.

¹ Do you believe that the point of view as presented in the [i:469c055f66]Vagina Monologues[/i:469c055f66] reflects a view of womanhood that is biblical?

² Do the [i:469c055f66]Vagina Monologues[/i:469c055f66] present a point of view in a manner that honors Christ?

Although I would be as resistant to seeing paintings made out of semen as I would menstrual blood, I think this might be a good thing for Christians to talk about. I’ve never seen “The Vagina Monologues”. I am suspicious of it because it seems like it comes from a glorification-of-women standpoint. I’m not sure that focusing on women’s sexual organs is the best way to liberate them from thousands of years of tyranny. And I’m not so keen on the assumption of “equality” that runs underneath the women’s liberation movement. But perhaps something has changed since Christ in the way we are to think of such things as menstruation and bodily discharges.

i should clarify that i did not see [i:ef9a855ec1]The Vagina Monologues[/i:ef9a855ec1], but that some friends saw it and my article drew on their reactions. my intention was not to critique the content of the monologues themselves, but to analyze the reactions i saw emerging from the performance and the way in which the experience opened up communication among the group about women’s issues and how our society generally approaches them. this includes how a Christian woman should respond to menstruation in the context of a life lived in faith. and so i can’t adequately answer your questions, Krenovian, until i’ve seen a performance. i’d be interested in hearing from people who have seen [i:ef9a855ec1]The Vagina Monologues[/i:ef9a855ec1] on Krenovian’s questions.

my impression is that a lot of this has to do with language and naming things as they are without the shame that’s generated by systemic abuse of power. naming and publicizing a show as [i:ef9a855ec1]The Vagina Monologues[/i:ef9a855ec1] shocks many of us and we should be asking why. did God intend competition and secretiveness between the sexes or did God intend open partnership and celebration of differences? my hunch is that [i:ef9a855ec1]Monologues[/i:ef9a855ec1] reinforces competitiveness and we ought to be looking for a prophetic Christian voice that will address the same issues in a more discerning way. but again, i’m speaking without experience of the show and would like to hear from others who have seen it.

likewise, as believers, we should be naming idols as we see them—as Grant pointed out with the women’s liberation movement’s idolatry of equality. i’m assuming that’s what you mean when you say you aren’t "so keen," which is a funny way of stating it that could incite some angry womyn… :)

on a related note, if anyone has questions about using the Diva Cup, i’d be happy to answer them by e-mail (kirstinvgr*at*cultureisnotoptional*dot*com).

When I say I’m “not so keen” on the drive to equality for women, I don’t mean that I’m afraid of women being considered equal to men. I love women and often feel that they are in many ways far superior to men :wink: !!!

I just think “equality” is a lowest common denominator kind of goal. Why are we trying to be equal? What kind of goal is that? (see “The Incredibles”) Women are special, unique and great in their own way…and not just because they have vaginas. And not just because they are mothers, though all these things contribute to their identity, to be sure.

This topic interests me because I’ve been thinking more and more that people’s sexuality in our culture has become very reduced to sexual organs and the act of intercourse. We are eminently confused about issues of homosexuality, gender roles, what constitutes “virginity” etc. because sexuality has become almost exclusively a “biological” function. My suspicion is that “The Vagina Monologues” operates within this same post-Victorian/post-Modern Scientistic schema.

This is an unabashed advertisement for The Keeper

I just started using the Keeper in February. It’s my new favorite thing. I can’t believe all those years spent using disposable methods of responding to my period. I have to admit though, I was scared to start using it. THankfully, I would walk past the collection of Keepers and Glad Rags at my co-op and was reminded on a weekly basis to think about it. I finally just got fed up with disposable methods and kept asking myself, “is this waste worth it for my convenience?” The answer was always no. So, I bought the Keeper and tried it out my next cycle. To my wonderful surprise, it’s easier than anything else I’ve ever used. No mess, no odor, no discomfort (if inserted correctly).

Every month when my period arrives, I no longer dread or feel guilty about the waste produced and announce to my husband how much I love my Keeper. He tends to reply with a bit of sarcasm that, “Oh, I was just going to ask you.”

I plan on giving The Keeper as a gift to a few friends who share similar environmental values as I do. It’s a revolutionizing invention. I love it!