catapult magazine

catapult magazine

Vol 3, Num 11 :: 2004.05.21 — 2004.06.03


More than I asked for

But I?m an adult! I wanted to scream into my parents? faces. I turned and strode back to my room summoning every ounce of self-control in me to make myself not slam the door. I flopped onto my bed. My screams were muffled by my pillow. Why can?t they understand that I am perfectly capable of making my own decisions? I don?t need to clear everything with them!

This was not the first time since I?d begun college that my parents and I didn?t see eye to eye, especially since I?d begun dating Justin. In my mom?s opinion, I?d become defiant and stubborn since we?d started going out.

As I lay on my bed that night I prayed, ?God, please give me an opportunity to show my parents that I am an adult and don?t need their approval for everything. Let it be something that doesn?t involve Justin so my parents don?t think I?m being stubborn because of him.? Little did I know that this prayer would change my life.

Weeks passed, and Christmas break arrived. No opportunities had arisen yet. During break I spent an evening with my friend Rebekah. We hadn?t seen each other in months so time seemed to sprout wings. Before I knew it my curfew loomed over my head. At the moment all I wanted to do was stay with Rebekah, so I picked up her phone, dialed my parents? house, and told them I was going to be staying at Rebekah?s for a couple more hours. My dad?s reply was, ?Jessica, your mom really needs you to come home.? This was my chance! I exalted in my victory. I could tell my parents I had decided to stay anyway and show them that I was grown up. I opened my mouth, but the words faded on my lips. I can?t, I thought. Proverbs says that acting in wisdom means promoting peace. Would those words bring peace? God, I hate it when you test me and flip my prayers around like that. In a grumbling voice I said, ?Fine. I?m coming home.?

I knew I was doing what was right, but that didn?t make me any less furious. When I reached home, I banged the door open and stomped off to my room, ignoring my mom?s pleas to talk. I slammed the door to my room and collapsed to the floor not even bothering to turn on the light. I sat in the darkness sobbing hot, angry tears.

A strip of light shown into my room. It widened and my mom entered and knelt beside me. Soon we were both crying?separately at first, but soon we cried together as our hearts were joined in peace. My tears fell faster as I realized how perfectly God had answered my prayer, my test of Him. He had given me the opportunity I had asked for. However, the behavior required of me to demonstrate my adulthood was completely opposite from what I had supposed it would be, and instead of me testing God, God had tested me.

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